What is revenge really telling us?

Revenge is a strong emotion. It is an emotion that can feel like we want to rip someones head off or do something so that the other person feels our pain. We want them to understand how their action was the trigger to the deep pain we now feel.

We want justice!

Boy, do I remember feeling this way that the night I found out about the betrayal and the many months that followed. It tugged and pulled at me because I felt so deeply hurt.

To pull myself out of it I asked myself, “What is it that I need right now?”

Revenge usually means a needs within us is being denied. That need could be respect, acceptance understanding, to be heard soothed, secure, safety, appreciation, communication, etc.

For in those moments after the betrayal I recognized I needed respect, to be fully seen and safety. I was not going to get it from him. In all honesty as much as I wanted it from him, so the rug could be put back where it was (back to the familiar which felt safe), I needed to respect myself because I deserved better. I would be betraying myself if I got it from him.

I decided to respect myself, fully see myself and give myself safety. That washed the need for revenge away. That gave me back my power and freedom.

If you are feeling revengeful ask yourself, “What do I need in this moment?”

Much Love & Light,

Kerri-Ann

www.kerri-ann.com