Reflection Through Others
What makes having a community, friends, a therapist or coach so powerful is that it offers a reflection through others. Having someone listen to understand and ask questions to pull out what is actually going on under the surface helps you identify your true limitations.
So often you think your blocks are outside of you.
- There are no good jobs out there.
- My partner is causing the issue.
- I don’t have enough money or time to do that.
- I can’t seem to get healthy enough to do anything differently.
I am not denying that all those things are happening AND the real issue is under the surface.
What is more beneficial is having a group of friends, a community or a coach that can help you identify the root cause. They can reflect back to you what they are seeing, what is the blindspot for you.
If you don’t address the root cause, then things continue to remain the same.
Let me give you a simple example: My step-father took down a tree in the backyard but he didn’t dig deep enough to take out the root. All summer he complained because the tree kept trying to grow back. Nothing he did was stopping it from coming back. I finally said, “You might want to put the time and money you are using to manage the surface issues into removing the root.”
He didn’t want to hassle with how much of the backyard he would have to dig up to get the root out but in the end nothing was going to change until he did.
You need to address the root cause in order for the symptoms to go away and for a new reality to emerge. AND finding that root cause and removing it is a lot easier and faster with the support of others to reflect back what you can’t see. You can’t see what you can’t see. It is better to have an extra mirror when you are driving and need to see that blindspot. Isn’t driving easier with that mirror?
Find a community, friends, a therapist or coach that can help you with your blindspot. Those who will hold space for you, accept you and love you no matter what. You are inherently worthy of this support and love.
Much Love & Light,